We go to a board meeting for Dunkin’ Donuts. The company’s CEO, Nigel Travis, sits at the head of the table, soliciting advice from his top advisers. All his yes-men are nodding their heads in approval of everything. Nigel sets plans for the future in motion, “Alright guys, the heart-shaped donuts for Valentine’s Day were a hit again. Those four-leaf clover sprinkles for St. Patrick’s Day were brilliant. What’s next?”
One adviser get’s the ball rolling, “We’ve never tackled Easter before, people eat donuts on Easter right?”
Nigel confidently responds, “People eat donuts when we tell them to eat donuts!”
Another adviser suggests, “Well then how about a dyed egg donut, it can be filled with egg salad.”
“I like it, we can make the distinction between dessert donuts and breakfast donuts, sell twice as many donuts,” says Nigel.
“A true desert donut would be the Reese’s Peanut Butter Egg Donut,” another adviser says, chiming in.
“Great idea, people love those once-a-year-shaped Reese’s cups that are in the stores year-round,” responds Nigel.
“I say f*ck it, let’s make a Peep donut! Fill a donut with sponges and tell people they love it,” Janet, the head of marketing suggests.
Fred, the head engineer supports Janet by telling her, “Actually, I’ve done some research on this already. Peep material is actually cheaper than sponges. They’re made with the leftover scraps of the fake marshmallows used in Lucky Charms…that fell on the floor.”
Excitedly, Nigel says, “This is a great idea, how do we market it?”
Janet, putting on her marketing cap says, “PEEP-le run on Dunkins.”
Ending the discussion, “That’s the worst thing I’ve ever heard, print it up! It’s time to make the donuts!” says Nigel.
Based on a real thing.
It’s too bad this pizza place couldn’t find an actual pepperoni pizza to take a photo of and instead had to draw on their own, rather unhealthy looking, dots: