Gabe Kapler’s Lottery

There was a time when I used to take photos of everything and everyone. My graduation present from high school was a digital camera, back when a 4MP point-and-shoot cost $400, and I took pictures constantly. I keep meaning to get back into taking more photos, but I just can’t seem to motivate myself. Someday. Anyways, I was looking through some old photos from college and, oh boy, did I find some good ones. I’ll be getting to some more in the future, but here’s one of my favorites:

Photo by Matt Aromando (October 2006 - Boston, MA)

This is from my junior-year dorm room at Northeastern. Gabe Kapler, then a player on the Red Sox, was the spokesperson for Northeastern’s initiative against the abuse of women. I came across a stack of posters from the campaign and hung them up all over one wall of my room. Then there is the sign misspelling $2,000,000 in well spent printer paper/ink including a footnote located near the bottom left of the photo that reads “Chances of winning are 0%, you lose.”

So, if it’s not already obvious, why did I think hanging these posters was a funny idea? I understand abusing women is not a funny subject, but that won’t keep me from finding this poster utterly ridiculous. Just something about a guy crossing his arms to accentuate his muscles (a.k.a. doing the Simon Cowell) seems inappropriate for an ad against physical abuse.

Then, there’s the caption under the poster, which starts of by saying:

Hitting is a big part of baseball. But it should play no part in the game of life. Unfortunately, sometimes it does…

Well, that’s blunt. This is what you’d call, “hitting the nail on the head,” that is if hitting things was allowed in the game of life.

By Matt Aromando

Stand-up, improv, and sketch comedian.

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